SC Angrense have beaten FC Porto this season. Seriously. Porto. We beat them in the cup under my predecessor, Eduardo Almeida. Roger told me in the midst of a heated Connect 4 battle this week. Things turned sour after I trapped his line of 3 during the late-game and the insults turned personal. I think he just wanted to hurt me, so he told me.
I can’t even be the giant slayer can I? I can’t even have that one thing. It wasn’t a full strength Porto team obviously, but that doesn’t matter. I’d love to beat a side like Porto with nearly 2000 packed into Estádio Municipal de Angra do Heroismo.
Oh and here’s the kicker, “we” won in extra time. Well la-de-fucking-da Eduardo. Höllviken could have had 15 shots and 3 goals from open play against Hammarby too if we’d wanted to. We could’ve won without the lottery of a penalty shootout too if we’d wanted to.
This is very much the same feeling you get when you think you’ve done OK in the dating world in your time and then you find out your girlfriend used to date FC Porto.
Oh, what’s that Eduardo? You couldn’t even beat Caldas SC during your tenure? The side currently sat at the top of our Relegation stage group with 6 wins out of 6 and the only side we haven’t played yet? You only managed 1-1 and 2-2 draws against them? And also Hammarby are better than Porto anyway? Yeah fair points Eduardo.
I think it’s quite clear what I need to do. After Sunday, when the Volcano Island natives are asked who The One True Giant Slayer of Hero Creek is, their collective answer will consist of 2 syllables, not 6. Unless those 6 are: “Franjo, who crushed Caldas”.
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